Have you ever seen a meal on Instagram that looked so insanely good that it made your mouth water and you couldn’t wait to go eat it? That was me with Ranch Pizza in Portland, Oregon. But just because a place makes “Instagram-able food” doesn’t automatically mean it’s going to taste good. Trust me, I’ve been duped a few times by other foodies snapping pics for the ‘gram and then being totally let down on how it tasted in person.
Luckily Ranch Pizza is not one of those spots.
It’s every bit as good as those perfectly filtered Instagram posts made it look.
Ranch Pizza originated inside of Poison’s Rainbow, a bar on NE 28th and Flanders that just so happens to be owned by Modest Mouse frontman Isaac Brock. The bar is quirkily decorated (but could use a little more pizzazz to feel more homey, in my opinion).
In this kitchen, they serve up thick-crusted, saucy, square pies that were just asking to be dipped in their namesake ranch dressing.
We started off with a salad – yes, I’m that lame person who nearly always orders salad with her pizza. Is it because I’m watching my waistline? Maybe. But also I’m a freak who genuinely loves salad. Give me your kale, your chard, your arugula masterpieces. I want to try them all.
The Farm Greens salad was an excellent start to the meal, with a boatload of crispy croutons, and duh – ranch dressing.
Of course, no over-the-top pizza meal is complete without MORE carbs in the form of garlic-y, cheesy breadsticks.
For our square pie, I chose the #4 with Italian Sausage, Mama Lil’s Peppers, and Ricotta. We also ordered a 1/4 pie of the Hawaiian (Look, it wasn’t me that ordered it. I’m not #TeamPineapple. But I heard it was delicious.)
For four big eaters, a whole and a quarter pie comes to $28 – and we actually left a slice on the table. It was, of course, a middle slice. The crust here really steals the show, so everyone wants the corners.
Of course, being situated inside of a bar, I had to get a drink. Frozen margarita? Now you’re speaking my language. I’m trying to live that #SkiptheStraw life, so I asked the bartender to please not add a straw to my drink. My sister also got a frozen margarita and when hers came sliding across the bartop, I quickly asked for a straw. Why? Because their straws are freakin’ Red Vines! That’s the kind of plastic-free drink vessel I’m all about. Oh, and the margs are strong here. A+.
Overall, we had four happy eaters with full bellies after dinner at Ranch PDX. With two drinks, two apps, and plenty of pizza for four, our tab came to $75. I feel like the pizza is definitely fairly priced for the quality and amount that you get, which isn’t always the case.
Since my first visit to Poison’s Rainbow, Ranch Pizza has added a second location that they get to call their own at 1760 NE Dekum. This second location is complete with a dog-friendly patio where you can sip a cold beer on a hot summer night and slip Fido some crusts under the table (unless you’re a complete monster). I can’t wait to check out their new location.
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